jane chapman

couples therapy
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OVERVIEW

Using attachment informed theory, I support couples through negative cycles and provide a clear path towards harmony. By helping couples develop a non-blaming, honest, vulnerable communication with each other, they experience a deeper, more intimate and supportive connection together.

Understanding and arresting the cycles or ‘dance’ couples find themselves stuck in, creates the opportunity to move into a softer closer space together. Through spending time to really explore and heal from deep wounds in the relationship, whether they be past hurts, traumas, loss or infidelities, I support partners towards a much healthier and secure bond together.

How it works

By Guiding couples through a structured process, I help them to improve their emotional connection and communication skills. Here are some ways that I can help couples:

1. Creating a safe and supportive environment:  a safe space where both partners can express their feelings and concerns without fear of judgment or criticism.

2. Identifying negative patterns: help to identify and understand negative communication patterns and emotional reactions that contribute to conflict and distance in the relationship.

3. Exploring underlying emotions: explore and understand the underlying emotions driving their behaviours and reactions, such as fear, shame, or insecurity.

4. Healing Relational Fractures: gently revisiting past fractures that are still causing upset and conflict in the present.

5. Promoting emotional attunement: help partners attune to each other’s emotions and needs, fostering empathy, understanding, and connection.

6. Facilitating effective communication: teaching effective communication skills, such as active listening, expressing feelings, and validating each other’s experiences.

7. Encouraging emotional engagement: EFT therapists guide couples in expressing vulnerable emotions and needs to deepen their emotional bond and create a secure attachment.

8. Offering tools for conflict resolution: The therapist provides tools and strategies for managing conflict constructively, resolving differences, and rebuilding trust.

ORIGINS

One of the key principles of emotionally focused couples therapy is the idea that
emotions are at the core of all human interactions and that all individuals have a
deep need for emotional connection and security in their relationships.
By helping couples identify and address their attachment needs, a stronger
foundation for trust and intimacy can be formed. Through the healing power of
emotional connection, couples can learn to navigate conflicts and challenges in a
more constructive and compassionate way, ultimately strengthening their bond and
creating a more fulfilling and lasting relationship.

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) was developed by Clinical Psychologist Sue Johnson.
She believes that EFT is an effective approach for helping couples improve their relationships
by focusing on emotions and attachment. Johnson emphasizes the importance of creating a
secure emotional bond between partners to promote healing and deepen connection. She
believes that by addressing underlying emotions and attachment needs, couples can create a
more satisfying and lasting relationship. Johnson also emphasizes the importance of empathy,
validation, and understanding in the therapeutic process.

“The drama of love is all about this hunger for safe emotional connection, a survival
imperative we experience from the cradle to the grave. Loving connection is the only safety nature ever offers us.”

Dr Sue Johnson

 

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